They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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