i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
