I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
