thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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