3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
