There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
