Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Success! We fucked roommates!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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