I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We have started to decorate penises.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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