ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
