i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
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Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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