So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
