My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Randomize
