i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
