I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
