Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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