did you get engaged???
You work out of a Hotel?
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He shit in the fireplace
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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