Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
