Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
