I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He better not be in your backpack
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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