and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
