I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
