I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
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