My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Randomize
