i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
