Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
