i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize