I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I puked a lego.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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