sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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