I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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