I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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