you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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