Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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