How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
