What a fucking waste of an outfit
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer is more important than you right now.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize