I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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