I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
