Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
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