i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Randomize
