i don't like sucking hair
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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