I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize