Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Randomize
