then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
She has the best kind of daddy issues
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize