Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize