i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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