he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
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She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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