Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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