Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
