I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize