stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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