Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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