she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
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spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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